?

Log in

Previous Entry | Next Entry

Fic: Always Listening; Tim/Kon; PG-13

Title: Always Listening
Author: Aravis Tarkheena
Pairing: Tim/Kon
Rating: PG-13ish
Warnings: Angst, schmoop
Disclaimer: Not Mine, everyone's legal
Word Count: ~2,000 maybe? Short.
Author's Notes: I needed schmoop. This is dedicated to lkidl whose drawings always make me smile. *kisses* I HOPE THIS MAKES YOU SMILE TOO! ~<3




Always Listening


Tim closed his stinging eyes and took a deep breath as his laptop powered down. He leaned forward on the sofa where he sat, elbows resting on his knees and his face buried in his hands. Exhaling, Tim massaged the bridge of his nose.

Tim's entire body ached, his shoulder muscles pulled painfully. Tim had the queasy feeling in the pit of his stomach that was always came from too much coffee and not enough sleep. His stomach roiled, and the tight, headachy feeling at the base of his skull intensified, as a flurry of negative emotions he had been holding at bay swirled to the forefront of his mind.

Tim's throat tightened as he pressed the heels of his hands to his eyes. Inhaling deeply, Tim tried hard to concentrate on the simple task of breathing. He bit his lip as he tried, and failed, to focus on even the most basic of meditation techniques.

Tim couldn't seem to push back the feelings that were threatening to overwhelm him.

The way he was feeling made no sense. The past few days hadn't been terrible, not for him anyway. No one had died, no one had been maimed, no one had gotten lost in time or in space. There had even been a break in the murder case he had been working. Tim hadn't been beaten up any more than usual. School hadn't been as stressful as it could be. Damian was out of the country, so he had only had to worry about the bad guys stabbing him. And it had been a full six weeks since Jason had tried to steal his Ducati.

Things just weren't bad right now. Ultimately, Tim's emotional turmoil just didn't make any sense on any fundamentally logical level. Unfortunately, Tim had found rationalizing never really made the bad feelings abate. That just made Tim feel even worse. He couldn't fix something that made no sense to him. He couldn't make things better when they weren't bad to begin with.

Tim fought fought down the panic, and took another deep breath. Focusing on drawing air in through his lungs, and pushing it out through his nose, just like Shiva had taught him, years ago. It was a simple, familiar sensation. His chest expanded as cool air rushed into his lungs. He held it for an exact three count, before giving up and letting all the air out in an uncontrolled whoosh.

Tim scrubbed his hands over his face as he shook his head back and forth, trying fruitlessly to clear his mind. There was just so much swirling around in his head, a million different thoughts that just bombarded him. He was trying hard to focus on something else, something other than his damned feelings, when he heard a soft tapping at his bedroom window.

Wanting very badly not to have to deal with whichever meta it was hovering outside his bedroom window at three in the morning, Tim sighed, and levered himself off of the sofa. He made his was slowly towards the bedroom. He wasn't at all sure of his ability to carry on a conversation right now, however Tim really did want something to divert his attention.

Kon was already pushing his window open when Tim walked through his bedroom door. Kon squirmed gracelessly through the small window, and stumbled to his feet on Tim's carpeting.

Throwing Tim a sheepish grin, Kon pulled the window shut behind himself, and wrinkled his nose.

“Next time you move, do me a favor and get a place with bigger windows, yeah?” Kon asked. “If I grow anymore, I'm gonna get stuck. That's not something I want to explain to your landlord...”

“I'll take that into advisement with the understanding that you will consider using the door in the future,” Tim said dryly. “What did you need?”

Kon's face went serious. He just looked at Tim for a long moment, before pursing his lips.

“I don't need anything man,” Kon told him softly. “I just came by to check up on you.”

“You came to check up on me?” Tim asked, eyebrow lifted archly.

“Yeah dude,” Kon said, almost tensely. He dropped his gaze to the footlocker by the bed where Tim kept his camera equipment. He shrugged almost fiercely before meeting Tim's eyes again. “I can always tell when you're having a rough time of it.”

Tim felt his face go numb. He swallowed hard against the tight feeling in his throat. Blinking hard, Tim tore his eyes from Kon's. It was suddenly very hard to breath. Tim knew he should say something, something light and funny and diverting. He just couldn't seem to make himself do anything but clench his jaw and force himself to breathe evenly.

“It's just, you usually give me more of a warning,” Kon went on in a hurried tone of voice. “Then I have some time to come up with an excuse to come over and bug you. You sort of took me by surprise this time, Wonder Boy.”

“How did...” Tim tried and then trailed off, not entirely sure what it was that he wanted to ask Kon.

“Oh you know,” Kon said airily, “just listening.”

Tim blinked in confusion, and looked up at Kon.

“Listening?”

“Yeah man, the way you talk, the way you breathe, even your heart sounds a little funky when you're all upset. I can just tell, you know?”

“You've been listening to me? All night?” Tim asked tightly.

Kon rolled his eyes, and made an expansively hand gesture, narrowly missing a very delicate porcelain lamp Alfred had given Tim as a housewarming gift.

“I'm always listening,” Kon said, as if that should have been obvious to Tim. As if it was natural. As if it was normal. As if everyone knew what their best friend's heart sounded like when he was about to have a serious freak out. As if it really was something Kon always did.

Tim's throat got even more tight, and he had to wait another moment before he could speak again.

“Aren't I supposed to be the stalker?” Tim tried for a joke.

“See, you're the sneaky stalker who never gets caught,” Kon explained, pointing to Tim. “I'm the stalker who breaks cover whenever his target looks like he needs a cuddle. It's why Kory banned me from any and all Titans stake outs.”

“Kory banned you from stake outs because you and Bart started the jet on fire,” Tim corrected him automatically.

Kon grinned at him, and snickered. Tim gave him a small smile in return, both of them remember that particular night of aborted crime fighting.

“I really look like I need a cuddle?” Tim asked softly.

“Oh totally,” Kon blustered. “If you looked any more pathetic and needy, homeless kittens would be cooing at you, dude.”

“Kittens?”

“Mmmmm hmmm,” Kon confirmed. “Trust me, I know what I'm talking about. I have lots of experience with homeless kittens and sorry looking Bats.”

“Sorry looking?” Tim responded indignantly.

Kon gave Tim a pitying look. “I'm pretty sure that, for the last week or so, the bad guys have been letting you bring them to justice just because they feel bad for you.”

Tim pulled a wry face. “That would not be terribly surprising to learn. They probably thought I would burst into tears and collapse on them if they didn't let me win.”

“Little know fact about bad guys: They hate to see a pretty boy cry,” Kon intoned authoritatively.

Tim let out a soft snort of amusement. Kon gave him a little crooked smile, and hovered over to him.

“Just be glad it was me who took it upon myself to provide the much needed cuddle, and not, for example, The Penguin,” Kon said, setting back down on the floor right next to Tim.

“You certainly do smell better,” Tim agreed. “That's a plus.”

“That's the spirit!” Kon cried, flinging his arms wide, and making little welcoming gestures towards Tim.

Tim gave him a level look. Kon smiled wider, and started making little encouraging noises that sounded like Kon did, in fact, use them on homeless kittens. Tim couldn't help but smile, but he still hesitated.

“In the interest of honesty,” Tim said. “I feel the need to confess that I am slightly out of practice in the cuddling arena.”

“Wow,” Kon replied in a deadpanned voice, “I am completely shocked. I think I may have a heart attack from the massive amounts of shock I'm feeling right now.”

Tim narrowed his eyes at Kon, and Kon grinned back.

That was the only warning Tim received, before Kon scooped Tim into his arms and swooped them over to the bed. Faster than Tim could properly process, Kon settled them gently down onto the comforter with his TTK.

Tim was still floundering in what felt like a sea of limbs, when Kon propped himself, half sitting, against the headboard of Tim's bed. He kicked off his boots, as he pulled Tim down half on top of him. Tucking Tim's head under his chin, Kon squirmed until they were both situated as comfortably as possible.

Kon sighed happily, as he pulled Tim in close, pressing his nose into Tim's hair.

“Ok, truth time for me, too. Maybe you weren't the only one who needed a cuddle,” Kon admitted, running a hand up and down Tim's back.

“I'm starting to remember the appeal,” Tim agreed, pressing his face into Kon's neck, and appreciating the feel of another person's skin against his own.

It really had been quite a long time since anyone had held him like this. It had been even longer since anyone had held him like this outside the context of a tragedy.

Tim let out a soft sigh, and relaxed into Kon, wrapping his arms around Kon's chest. He rested his head against Kon's shoulder, and breathed in his scent. It still surprised Tim a little that, after all that had happened over the past few years, Kon still smelled just like he had the first time the two of them had met.

It was comforting in ways that Tim wasn't sure he would have been able to adequately describe.

“It's all coming back, huh?” Kon teased, rubbing his nose against Tim's hair.

“Very slowly. Though, I think I'm going to need another minute or two to get over the emasculating manhandling that just took place.”

“Pbbbft,” Kon scoffed, “that's stupid. This is the manliest of cuddling right here.”

“That is not even remotely true and you know it. You're really kind of a girl, aren't you?” Tim asked conversationally.

Kon laughed softly.

“Maybe sometimes,” Kon admitted. “Just don't tell the bad guys.”

Tim tilted his head back to smile at Kon. “You never know. It might help. I hear they're suckers if you start to cry...”

Kon smiled back at him, and that tightness in Tim's chest started to fade. It felt like someone had lifted a pile of bricks from off of his chest and, for the first time in what felt like forever, Tim could breathe freely again.

Tim closed his eyes and pressed his face into the crook of Kon's neck again. He took a deep breath, counting as he pulled the air into his lungs. He held it there, for a moment, chest feeling full and warm as it expanded. He breathed out slowly through his nose, counting again as he did so. Just like Shiva had taught him. It came back easily, the familiar pattern of inhalations and exhalations relaxing him.

“Feeling better?” Kon asked softly.

“Mmmm,” Tim agreed.

“Good, you sound better.”

Tim opened one eye and lifted a sardonic brow. “I'm right here and you're still listening?”

Kon tightened his arms around Tim for a split second before speaking again. “I always listen, man,” Kon repeated.

“I'm actually glad to hear that, Kon,” Tim said, and squeezed back.





A/N: Raise your hand if your teeth hurt! Please do not give your dentists my name. I suspect I'm already on their black lists.


Comments

( 39 comments — Leave a comment )
faile_neume
Apr. 18th, 2011 11:09 pm (UTC)
KAJDHFSKDJGHDSKJGSDG ;~;

Kon always listening to Tim is already my headcanon and this expanded on it in such an awesome way. I just kind of sat here making cooing sounds at the screen because ahhhhhhh they're so precious.

(Also I finally got around to sending out one of the packages I have for you, so hopefully you should get it soon! It's been sitting on my desk for like, a month, because I am the worst friend.)
aravistarkheena
Apr. 18th, 2011 11:17 pm (UTC)
I'm pretty sure that's EVERYONE'S head cannon. :D

I'm glad you liked it.

You are not a bad friend, don't be silly. I can't wait to see it. Or to send you a thank you card. You're going to love these new ones I got. They have Robots. I trust I need not say more.

OMG so does my new journal! It's covered in Robots. It's cuter than the dino one. I should post pics. :D
faile_neume
Apr. 18th, 2011 11:21 pm (UTC)
Tim and Kon are just constantly stalking each other. Someone tell FabNic to include that in the next issue of Red Robin.

Robots! Robots are the greatest things, I am already excited too see it. I used my awesome wax seal on the letter I sent you. Because I am fancy and stuff.

Eeee. Robots! I am still using the typewriter notebook you sent me, even though it's getting trashed in my bag. Oops ^_^;
aravistarkheena
Apr. 19th, 2011 12:27 am (UTC)
Seriously. :DDD

Oh man, I'm totally on a robot kick. <3 I'll take pictures tomorrow and post them.

I can't wait to see your stationary set! <3333 I"m a little too in love with stationary. :DD

I'm glad you're getting use out of it. I'm sorry it's falling apart. I got one too and mine fell apart as well. I'm sorry. If I had known, I wouldn't have sent it. I had to rubber band mine together. D:
faile_neume
Apr. 19th, 2011 12:33 am (UTC)
Robots are awesome. Especially adorable one.

It's actually just normal paper! But sealed with wax. I couldn't use a proper card and pretty things as you will understand when you get the package.

It's okay, it's not your fault! I should be using it as my at home journal, rather than my take places one, but it's such a good size that I end up taking it everywhere.
aravistarkheena
Apr. 19th, 2011 12:55 am (UTC)
Oh these are super cute. There are DOG robots. :D

Cool cool.

That's why I got it. Because it was such a great PURSE journal. I'm back to the super sturdy spiral bound ones these days. I'm having a ton of fun decorating them though! Scrap book paper is awesome and now owns large parts of my heart.
faile_neume
Apr. 19th, 2011 05:15 am (UTC)
Dog robots! The best kind of robots!

It's light too, unlike heavy spiral bound books, but yeah, those are definitely more sturdy. I need to buy a moleskin (or moleskin copy) about that size, because they're not too heavy but they have a nice cover that doesn't get wrecked. I always buy scrapbook paper and then never use it ^_^;
aravistarkheena
Apr. 19th, 2011 11:15 pm (UTC)
Oh totally, they're super cute. I'll post some pics in a bit.

Moleskins are pretty cool, but bound books always fall apart on me. I just beat the hell out of my journals!

I always get more scrapbook paper than I need. I want to make stationary and note cards out of it!
faile_neume
Apr. 19th, 2011 11:20 pm (UTC)
I need bound books, or spiral bound ones where the spiral is really sturdy, otherwise the spiral gets all bent outta shape. I'm usually pretty nice to my journals, but the one I take to uni gets really beat up.

I never get around to make stationary and cards, I don't have that many people to send them tto ^_^;
aravistarkheena
Apr. 20th, 2011 12:18 am (UTC)
New journal! :D

I always love sending out cards, I'm always looking for an excuse to send them out. I've gotten so many neat ones from people. I"m jealous of their card making skills! I wish I could be better at it.

faile_neume
Apr. 20th, 2011 12:23 am (UTC)
I saw! Yay!

I like sending out cards but I am terrible at putting words inside them. My mom is really good at making cards and I am jealous. But practice always helps! You should make lots of cards XD
aravistarkheena
Apr. 20th, 2011 12:47 am (UTC)
I always just babble in mine. :DDD

The real difficulty is finding the right sort of glue. I like the way spray glue LOOKS but it's sticky and I have to use it outside and it's been so WINDY and RAINY. What kind of glue does your mom use?
faile_neume
Apr. 20th, 2011 12:50 am (UTC)
Babbling is good. I think the letter I wrote you is like... two or three pages of me babbling.

My mom and I cheat and use double sided sticky paper. It's magical and she got it free from work when she worked with a photographer so we have tons of it. It's so easy to use, like double sided tape but really thin so it doesn't make things look bulky.
aravistarkheena
Apr. 20th, 2011 01:26 am (UTC)
I approve of babbling. <3333

I should try that and see if it works. I used a glue pen on my journal. I glued the paper to the plastic cover but that seemed to make the plastic bend. :(

I'll give the tape a try!
faile_neume
Apr. 20th, 2011 12:30 pm (UTC)
Yeah, glue can make things go weird, but JAC paper (the technical name for it that I just googled) is good because it doesn't actually affect the paper or plastic or whatever.
the_protagonist
Apr. 18th, 2011 11:42 pm (UTC)
HNGH!

I loved this! And Kon and Tim... they aren't my OTP or anything! I just... you can definitely see Tim just... kind of stressing out; being a little OCD-neurotic mess and that really taking a toll on his physical and emotional health.

And I'm glad he has Kon to watch his back.

I really loved this; thanks for sharing! <3
aravistarkheena
Apr. 19th, 2011 12:42 am (UTC)
Man, I don't even HAVE an OTP but even I can't resist the Tim/Kon cuteness. <333

Kon's just an awesomely devoted best friend and sometimes I think Tim just gets so wrapped up in his life that he doesn't realize it until Kon does something like forcibly cuddle him. <3

Glad you liked it!
darthbatgirl
Apr. 19th, 2011 12:23 am (UTC)
Silly Timmy for Kon it IS normal to just listen. Especially to you.

Love how Kon says he usually makes up a reason to come over, but this time he didn't have the time. And the little cooing noises and hand gestures were just too funny.
aravistarkheena
Apr. 19th, 2011 12:43 am (UTC)
Hahahahah can't you totally just picture Kon cooing at him? :DDDDD With little hand motions and big goo goo eyes. :D

No one can resist. <3
larsinger29
Apr. 19th, 2011 12:25 am (UTC)
I love the idea that Kon is always listening out for Tim (and secretly wish my friends had the secret power to know when I was depressed and overwhelmed without me telling them!).

Your handling of Tim's emotional state was really well done. You brought a real level of realism to the overwhelming feelings he started suffering from which seemingly came from nowhere. Depression can strike like that, and the way you portrayed it was honest and striking.

Kon's method of dealing with it was really wonderful too. He provided the right amount of comfort without prying. He was simply there for Tim.

It was sweet, but it was honest as well. And hell, life has to be sweet at some points, right?
aravistarkheena
Apr. 19th, 2011 12:48 am (UTC)
Ha! I'm GLAD my friends don't have that power. Gloria would never let me leave her bed. She already threatens to tie me to it far too often!

I'm glad that the whole depression thing came off ok. I thought I had a sort of a rocky start. I couldn't come up with a decent hook, it seems. :(

I think Kon uses humor to lighten situations up. It's especially useful for distracting Timmys :DD

Oh man, I needed sweet. Sometimes, if you don't have your own Superboy, you gotta make your own sweet, you know?
larsinger29
Apr. 19th, 2011 04:57 pm (UTC)
I thought your hook was just fine, but maybe because I can identify with Tim, I might be biased. Depression isn't easy to write about, especially when it isn't sparked by a situational reason, but seems to be an attack out of nowhere. I really thought you did well on this. It drew me in, for what it's worth.

Yeah, Kon is a doll and knows perfectly how to distract Tim. And he can definitely bring the sweet!
aravistarkheena
Apr. 20th, 2011 12:10 am (UTC)
I actually just rewrote about 1000 words of the next part of Poaching because I hated what I did with the hook. I can either come up with awesome hooks, or just terrible ones. :(

I'm glad this one worked out for you.

Tim/Kon or Tim/Connor are my default pairings for sweet schmoop.
saavikam77
Apr. 19th, 2011 02:53 am (UTC)
Awwww!! *wibble* This was the sweetest, most perfect Tim/Kon fic EVER. ^___^

I suspect I might need to brush my teeth a little extra long tonight. XD
aravistarkheena
Apr. 20th, 2011 12:11 am (UTC)
Maybe use your mouthwash for an extra few seconds too. Just in case. :DD

Glad you liked it, darling. ~<333
lunatic_lullaby
Apr. 19th, 2011 03:01 am (UTC)
Things just weren't bad right now.

Which finally gives him time to feel bad. Really, how much stress does Tim have which just gets shoved back and delayed because he has too much else to think about and tend to in those hard times? His biggest coping skill seems to be repression.

“If you looked any more pathetic and needy, homeless kittens would be cooing at you, dude.”

*snicker* Way to lift things up. I can just picture Kon making tsking noises and going, "Here, kitty kitty kitty Timmy Timmy Timmy."

Kon was so sweet and wonderful. I love how he knows just the right buttons to push to tease Tim into a better headspace. Even if he's completely lacking in tact. XD
aravistarkheena
Apr. 20th, 2011 12:12 am (UTC)
Poor Tim. Someone needs to teach him better coping mechanisms.

Kon's just too awesome. He's good at teasing Tim into a better mood. :DDD
ladyblkrose
Apr. 19th, 2011 06:21 am (UTC)
“If you looked any more pathetic and needy, homeless kittens would be cooing at you, dude.”

“I'm pretty sure that, for the last week or so, the bad guys have been letting you bring them to justice just because they feel bad for you.”

Tim pulled a wry face. “That would not be terribly surprising to learn. They probably thought I would burst into tears and collapse on them if they didn't let me win.”


This is brilliant and further proof that Bats need loving Kryptonians to look after them. I believe I've read stuff that you may have written on the first gen Super/Bats having a similar situation and you've done it again here. But where Bruce have his control issues Tim has his neurotic freak-outs, a freak-out/bout of depression that you describe so well BTW.
Thank you for sharing this wonderful bit of manly cuddling, it was the best.
aravistarkheena
Apr. 20th, 2011 12:15 am (UTC)
Yeah, I love this dynamic between the Bats and Kryptonians. I'm sure I've beaten it to death again and again, but sometimes a girl just can't help herself. :DD

I'm glad that you enjoyed it!
lkidl
Apr. 19th, 2011 04:51 pm (UTC)
Oh yeah! This is definitely made me smile! Such an 'AAAAAAAAAAWWWWWW~<3' story~ <3 "Manliest of cuddling" it's so cute! :3 Great fic as always :D

And I passed my exams, so I finally have a free time! Woohoo! I should draw more Timmy I think :3
aravistarkheena
Apr. 20th, 2011 12:17 am (UTC)
I'm glad it made you smile. :D

I'm also glad you survived your finals! IT'S OVER!

Drawing lots of cute Timmys is totally the best way you can spend your time! I approve! *fist bump*
superfixated
May. 2nd, 2011 02:13 am (UTC)
The past few days hadn't been terrible, not for him anyway. No one had died, no one had been maimed, no one had gotten lost in time or in space.

LOL! Oh, COMICS. <3

And it had been a full six weeks since Jason had tried to steal his Ducati.

Jason is such an evil meanie head. :D

The way you describe Tim trying to relax is really good. I've been feeling that way all year so far, and it sucks. Though I am jealous Tim has his sweetheart stop by to "check up on him." <3

“I'm always listening,” Kon said, as if that should have been obvious to Tim. As if it was natural. As if it was normal. As if everyone knew what their best friend's heart sounded like when he was about to have a serious freak out. As if it really was something Kon always did.

This made my heart flutter -- Kon is such a sweetheart! He's always listening to Tim, to his heartbeat, to the way he's breathing, and he knows something is up right away. Everyone else can tell something's wrong by the way the person is behaving or the way the person sounds while talking. But sometimes people can pretend nothing's wrong and control the way they're talking a little better. But you can't do that with Kon around. :)

“Oh totally,” Kon blustered. “If you looked any more pathetic and needy, homeless kittens would be cooing at you, dude.”

*dies laughing* OMG, Koooooon <33333

The way you ended this was perfect! Tim and Kon snuggling and Kon making Timmy feel better. He needed this. He definitely needed Kon. I also needed this as well.

I think this is the first fanfic I've read all year, Bek. I'm delighted and excited to be back. I didn't realize how much I missed reading your awesome stories until now. I also need to go back and see what else I missed; obviously some really good stuff. Thank you for sharing! <3
aravistarkheena
May. 3rd, 2011 01:43 am (UTC)
Jay just really LIKES Tim's Duc. He also thinks Tim's Duc likes HIM. POssible more than she likes Tim. It's a game they play.

I know! I wish I had a Kon to come over and snuggle me too. I could use it!

Kon has proprietary feelings for Tim. Tim is HIS. He gets to listen whenever he wants. <3

I think everyone needed a little bit of fluff. I know I've been in need of it lately.

I'm glad that you read it and I'm glad that you liked it. I'm happy you're reading fic again, if only because I know that fic makes YOU happy. I hope you enjoy the other stuff I've written. Whenever I write Bruce/Clark I always think of you. <333

I'm working hard on my Dick/Tim right now. I'm sure you'll enjoy that. It's not QUITE ready to be written yet but I have half the outline done. Such a long story. D:

*kisses* I'm happy this cheered you up. <3333

Let me know if you ever need more cheering. I'd be more than happy to write something for you whenever you need some cuddles in your life. <3
honeycorrupts
May. 13th, 2011 01:36 am (UTC)
I love the image of this "Kon squirmed gracelessly through the small window"
aravistarkheena
May. 13th, 2011 02:03 am (UTC)
KOn is not small enough to be climbing through windows.
amothea
Jun. 22nd, 2011 06:42 am (UTC)
Loved your story. So glad Kon was there for Tim.
aravistarkheena
Aug. 17th, 2011 02:29 am (UTC)
Thanks so much! I'm glad you enjoyed it!
(Deleted comment)
aravistarkheena
Aug. 17th, 2011 10:35 pm (UTC)
Hahahaha, I'm glad you enjoyed it! <3
( 39 comments — Leave a comment )

Latest Month

April 2015
S M T W T F S
   1234
567891011
12131415161718
19202122232425
2627282930  

Tags

Powered by LiveJournal.com
Designed by Tiffany Chow